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First Masturbation' C0 C: d0 C' k' G0 p
G' I8 T) t6 R
Last month was the tenth anniversary of the first time I masturbated. I am 24 now, so the first time I masturbated was when I was 14. Yes, I know, that was very late for any guys. I guess I am a late bloomer. I guess I was very innocent. Or I might have just been ignorant. & h2 o* G( o0 N' R* S, \/ a
I am the only child in a typical Malaysian Chinese family, so masturbation isn't really a topic that will pop up during dinner, or during any other time at all, EVER. Sure, I might have been curious about all those little 'gut' feelings that I have been having ever since puberty. I have been touching myself more frequently than necessary, but had no idea what it meant. I would grind my little dick into the mattress at night because it just felt so good.
5 l2 Z2 t1 R4 N" p) O. m; Y4 PThen in school, we learnt about nocturnal emission (wet dream is the laymen term). That answered a question I have been having since I turned 11. Why did I keep pissing myself at night? And it didn't smell like piss! And all those crusted stuff on the underwear!
7 n2 v7 q) R/ c9 C' L- e* w) B! MWe didn't have sex education in school, so this little information was covered by our physical education teacher, and when he asked who had experienced it, I was the only one to raise my hand. The entire class looked at me. Some guys even came and asked me about it after the class. They have never experienced it before in their life? How come? The only answer they gave me was: if you do it enough, it won't happen. And I went: Do what enough? Nobody gave me an answer. Yea, I was innocent.
& B7 G1 u6 y9 hBeing in an all boys' school didn't help either. I guess I didn't have that many friends to share about these intimate details. In fact, I didn't really have any really close friends at all, those that you can call buddies. However, one day, a classmate sitting beside me in science class suddenly asked me if I masturbate. Of course I said yes! I didn't even know what that word means. He only hinted that it has something to do with playing with my dick. ' D! V) i4 g6 d
Oh yes, I do that a lot. I asked him in return: what do you use to play? He looked at me strangely and said: with my hands. I told him I use a towel, and that he should try it out sometimes. It's kinda cool. I suppose by then he should already have figured out that I have absolutely no idea what masturbation was all about. Evidently so, cause a few days later he came and ask me again if anything happens after I play for a long time. I told him no, just some pretty good feeling rubbing my dick on the towel. He suggested that I use my hand and note that feeling on my navel after some time. I was still confused and asked him what can the hand do? I think he almost died laughing. Just get it hard and stroke it, he said. You'll see what I mean.
% i% e+ D# b& J1 }3 D. kI can still remember it clearly, almost like it happened yesterday. I was in the shower, my parents in the living room, waiting for me to finish and then go to my Grandma's house for a family gathering. It was the Moon cake Festival. I was showering at usual, but got an erection while I was soaping up my body. I remembered what my friend said so I clasped my hands around my dick and began to stroke it a little. Damn, it felt good! I continue doing so for a while, all the while being careful not to make too much sound just in case my parent heard me outside. It was a very small house and the bathroom is really close to the living room. After stroking for a while, I felt a very strong feeling growing from deep within my balls, going up to my navel, almost like I needed to piss, only a hundred times stronger. I freaked! I stopped stroking, tried to calm myself down, realizing that my heart was beating faster than normal. Well, actually it was faster than when I finished my 100 meter sprint during sports practice earlier that morning. It was a new sensation, and it was freaking me out. What is happening? But then my friend's words of wisdom came back to me. Just keep doing it and you'll feel something after some time. You'll see what I mean. So I braced myself, and started stroking again. I was freaked out, but my dick wasn't. The erection didn't go away. It was only too happy when I resumed my stroking. It didn't take long this time for the feeling to return. Deep within my balls, I could feel something travel up inside me, through my navel, and into my dick, which got really hard by the way, and I could feel it travelling along it. I was determined to keep doing it this time, cause if it was piss, I was in the shower so there should be no problem.
7 i' H: c y7 ]6 eThe feeling grew stronger and then it came. I looked down at the exact moment when the first spurt of semen ejaculated from my dick, shooting out onto the cold tiled floor. My dick spasm, my body went rigid, and my breathing was short and shallow, and it didn't stop! Another spurt of cum pumped out, followed by another, and another. I had no idea how long it lasted, but it just kept going and going. Years of pent-up cum shot out in one long glorious climax. When I was done, I was amazed, shocked, happy, guilty, frightened, and damn comfortable! I was sweating and heaving, and after I calmed down, I leaned in to examine those fluid that just came out of my dick. They were yellow and they looked much thicker and stickier than piss.
1 Z3 I9 P! `4 K8 A+ Q( c$ SI think I knew what masturbation mean then. I think I knew what sex mean then. I think I discovered a little bit more about myself that day. I finished my shower and the rest of the night was spent with a thousand questions going through my head. I did talk to that friend of mine the next day, but the conversation didn't really go very far. I always wondered why he chose to 'impart' that wisdom to me, and then didn't want to talk about it. I guess a straight guy wouldn't feel very comfortable talking about it, especially if you are raised by a culture that considers sex as a taboo and dirty subject. 6 r" q8 n0 X# R/ G
Well, I knew I was gay way before I knew what masturbation meant. Heck, I knew about AIDS and how it is transmitted before I even heard of the word masturbation. Call me naive, call me ignorant, but that was how it happened. It was only years later that I came to find out that cum was supposed to be white, or milky in colour, and the yellow colour is actually a stain caused by the mixture of urine. Of course, I have been masturbating a lot after that, so much that I got headache from it, just because I cummed so hard and so much in a day my brain was having trouble keeping count.
" r/ ]! O+ J# j8 b* bSo when people say that masturbation is a process of self-discovery, I agree with them, cause I know it first hand, personally, to be true. That first time sparked my curiosity in sex, so for the whole of next year, I spent all my free time learning about everything there is to know about sex. I did it the correct way though. Everyday after school, I would go to book stores and read all the books related to sex. They have some pretty good guides there. And please note that ten years ago, the word Internet hasn't even been invented in my country yet. By the end of the year, I have practically read all the sex-related books ever published in my country, and I can safely say that I knew more about sex than my parents do, albeit only the theory.
! P |& `# L0 t' SNow, ten years later, I am still jacking off. That sound weird to you? I suppose so, because regardless of whether I am gay or straight, I am still a virgin. Never had any experiences with a man or a woman before, never touched another person in their private places before, and never did any sorts of hanky-panky before. Sure, I know all about the theories of blowjobs, doggy-styles, anal sex, even more on kinky stuff like ropeworks, flogging, and dog training, but all in theory. ) z8 ^9 W6 n0 q5 E, A( O
Still a virgin at 24, and turning 25 in a couple of months. What can I say? I am an innocent guy. |
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发表于 2013-3-13 04:12
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